The Quiet Work of Becoming a Leader

Author:  Kanwaljit Chaudhry, 2026 Editorial Committee Volunteer 


Leadership rarely begins the way we expect it to. It doesn’t arrive with a title, a promotion, or a formal announcement. More often, it begins quietly, in moments that don’t look like leadership at all. 


A conversation where someone turns to you for direction.
A meeting where the discussion stalls and you step in to move it forward.
A situation where something feels off, and you choose to address it instead of walking away. 

These moments are easy to overlook. They don’t come with recognition or validation. Yet they are often where the real work of becoming a leader begins. 


It Starts Before You Feel Ready 


Many people assume they need to feel confident before they lead. In reality, leadership often shows up before confidence does. 


You may not have the answers.
You may not feel fully prepared.
You may even question whether it is your place to step forward. 

And yet, something in the situation asks you to. This is where leadership begins, not in certainty, but in response. The quiet decision to engage, to take responsibility, to move something forward. 


You Learn by Doing (and Re-doing) 


In the early stages, it’s common to try on different ways of leading. 


You might imitate someone you admire.
You might try to sound more decisive than you feel.
You might hold back when speaking up feels uncomfortable. 

Some approaches will work. Others won’t. That’s not failure; that’s formation. Over time, you begin to notice patterns: 


  • When do people respond to you? 
  • When do conversations open up or shut down? 
  • What feels natural, and what feels forced?
     

This is how your way of leading starts to take shape not through theory, but through experience. 


The Moments That Stay With You 


There are certain experiences that leave a mark. 


A difficult conversation you didn’t handle the way you hoped.
A decision you made under pressure.
A moment where someone trusted you and you rose to meet it. 

These are the moments you replay later. Not because they were perfect, but because they mattered. 


They shape your instincts.
They clarify your values.
They quietly influence how you show up the next time. 

This is the deeper work of leadership. The kind that happens after the moment has passed. 


Learning to See What Others Don’t Yet See 


As you grow, leadership begins to shift. It’s no longer just about responding well in the moment.

It becomes about noticing what might be coming next. You begin to ask: 

  • What risks are we not talking about? 
  • Where might this situation go if we don’t address it? 
  • What does the team need before the pressure builds? 

This is a subtle but important transition from reacting to anticipating. And it often develops quietly, through experience rather than instruction. 


Letting Go of What No Longer Works 

One of the less visible parts of leadership is learning to let go. 


Letting go of the need to have all the answers.
Letting go of habits that once worked but no longer serve you.
Letting go of the version of leadership you thought you needed to become.
 

This isn’t easy work. It requires honesty, humility, and a willingness to change. But it’s often where the most meaningful growth happens. 


The Role of Reflection 


Leadership doesn’t grow from experience alone; it grows from reflection. Taking time to pause and ask: 


  • What happened there? 
  • What did I learn? 
  • What would I do differently next time?
     

These moments of reflection don’t need to be formal. Sometimes they happen in conversation. Sometimes they happen quietly, at the end of the day. But they matter. Because they turn experience into insight and insight into growth. 


Becoming, Not Arriving 


There is a point many professionals are waiting for the moment when they will feel like a leader. For most, that moment never arrives in the way they expect. Because leadership is not a destination. It is an ongoing process of becoming. It is shaped in small, often unseen moments: 


  • when you choose to step forward 
  • when you learn from what didn’t go as planned 
  • when you adjust your approach 
  • when you stay open to learning
     

The quiet work of becoming a leader is not always visible to others. But over time, it becomes visible in how you think, how you act, and how others experience your presence. And that is what leadership truly looks like. 


 


“Leadership is not built in the moments where everything goes right. 
It is built in the moments where you pause, reflect, and choose to grow.”
 




The views and opinions expressed in this blog post belong solely to the original author(s) and do not necessarily represent the views and opinions of CPHR Alberta.



By Jessica Jaithoo May 5, 2026
Author: Nidhi Gandhi , 2026 Social Media Committee Volunteer Motherhood is often described as the world’s most demanding job, yet it rarely comes with a job description, a performance review, or a manual. It is a profound and often relentless act of stewardship that asks us to be an anchor, a strategist, and a source of support, sometimes all at once. For modern HR executives, this reality carries added complexity. Our professional lives are spent navigating organizational health, talent development, and culture. We shape workplace policies, advocate for employee well‑being, and bring the people perspective to the leadership table. When we step into the dual role of executive and mother, we aren’t simply balancing two lives; we are bringing together two complementary skill sets. As Deni Ruiz, Executive Director of People and Culture at Keyano College, explains: “In my role, I balance strategy with humanity, supporting leaders and employees, navigating change and complexity, and making tough decisions when needed. I am supported by an amazing team of professionals who care deeply for our colleagues, the College, and the community.” Being both an executive and a mother means showing up focused in the boardroom while also being a safe harbor at home. It requires constant recalibration and a willingness to redefine what success looks like at different stages of life. It also reinforces an important truth: empathy is not just a personal quality, it is a leadership asset. When we asked Deni how she transitions from mom mode to executive mode, she shared: “It’s less of a flip of a switch and more of a recalibration. I go from solving activities, snack logistics, and figuring out the root cause of meltdowns, to solving organizational challenges and understanding what motivates and engages people in the workplace. But at the core, both roles are about supporting people and making good, informed decisions, just at different complexity levels. A deep breath, a chai latte, and I’m in an executive mode. What I find a bit more challenging is transitioning back to ‘mom mode’ at the end of a long, busy day.” In this conversation, we look beyond titles to discuss the realities of nurturing a high‑level career while raising the next generation. Whether you are climbing the ladder, building a team, or navigating your own career path, this dialogue offers both reflection and reassurance that your path can evolve, and that is okay. How has motherhood shaped your approach to HR policies? Does it change how you view things like flexible work, benefits, or performance management? Motherhood has deepened my understanding of how policies land in real life. It’s made me more attuned to what employees are balancing outside of work, including growing demands related to child care, elder care, and mental health. That perspective has strengthened my support for flexible and inclusive workplaces, not as perks, but as tools for retention, productivity, and respect. Being a mom hasn’t lowered performance expectations; it has clarified how we enable people to meet them by recognizing the realities that shape today’s workforce and equipping leaders to respond thoughtfully. What is the most rewarding “full circle” moment you’ve had where your professional role and motherhood intersected? There are moments when I’m coaching my kids on family values, goal setting, or how to navigate conflict with their sibling, and other moments when I’m coaching leaders through difficult workplace conversations or career development decisions. I’ve realized I draw on the same patience, clarity, and empathy in both settings. Seeing those conversations handled well, and knowing they positively affect someone’s experience at work, feels like a true intersection of both roles. Just as each child is different, even within the same family, employees experience work differently. Understanding those realities helps build alignment and trust. What advice would you give to a mid ‑ career HR professional who is hesitant to pursue an executive role because they fear it will compromise their family life? It’s a valid concern. Executive roles come with more responsibility and mental load, but they also offer greater autonomy to shape how and when you work. The key is being intentional. Be clear on your non‑negotiables, choose organizations whose values align with yours, and remember that strong leadership includes modeling sustainable ways of working, not constant availability. If you could give a Mother’s Day gift to working moms, aside from a day off, what would it be? I’d give them the freedom to be genuine and true flexibility, the kind that is trusted, consistent, and free from career trade‑offs. When people don’t have to choose between being present at home and being seen as committed at work, that’s where working moms can truly thrive. The idea of perfect work‑life balance is overrated. Priorities shift over time, and only you and your family know what the right combination looks like in any given season. Deni’s journey reminds us that senior leadership and motherhood are not competing forces to be managed, but complementary roles that strengthen one another. The empathy cultivated at home makes us better leaders, just as strategic thinking at work helps us build stronger foundations for our families. As we celebrate Mother’s Day, let this conversation prompt reflection. You do not have to choose between being a successful professional and a present, nurturing parent. You can be both, and you can lead through both.
By Jessica Jaithoo April 21, 2026
Author: Taia Northrup , 2026 Social Media Committee Volunteer Building Safer Workplaces Every April 28th, World Day for Safety and Health at Work serves as an important reminder that workplace safety isn’t just a policy, it is a commitment to people. While procedures, protocols, and compliance requirements are essential, the true foundation of a safe workplace lies in a culture where employees feel valued, heard, and protected. In today’s evolving environment, safety goes beyond hard hats and hazard signs. It includes psychological safety, inclusive practices, and the ability for employees to speak up without fear. As organizations continue to adapt in a tech driven world, the role of Human Resources in shaping and sustaining this culture has never been more critical. Traditionally, workplace safety has been associated with physical risk prevention. While this is still vital, modern organizations are expanding their focus to include mental health, preventing burnout, and overall well-being. Which Leads to the Culture of Psychological Safety A truly safe workplace is one where employees feel comfortable sharing ideas, raising concerns, and admitting mistakes without fear. Psychological safety is essential for innovation, collaboration, and overall organizational success. Safety doesn’t always require large scale initiatives… Often it is small, consistent actions that make the biggest difference, these include: Checking in with employees regularly Offering training and refreshers Celebrating safe practices and milestones Creating opportunities for feedback As we recognize World Day for Safety and Health at Work, it is an opportunity to reflect on how we can continue to build safer, healthier workplaces. By prioritizing both physical and psychological well-being, organizations can create environments where employees thrive. At its core, safety is about people. When we lead with empathy, listen with intention, and act with purpose, we don’t just meet safety standards, we exceed them!
April 21, 2026
Chartered Professionals in Human Resources (CPHRs) bring a unique and deeply relevant skill set to senior governance roles—particularly those focused on equity, inclusion, and systemic change. With expertise in ethical leadership, organizational governance, people systems, and inclusive decision‑making, CPHR professionals are well positioned to contribute at the highest levels of public service. The Government of Canada is currently seeking applications for the role of Chairperson of the Canadian Race Relations Foundation (CRRF) Board of Directors, a Governor in Council appointment that offers an opportunity to shape national conversations on race relations and advance meaningful change across Canada.
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